Feeling A Bit Sentimental.

Well, I've been practicing my tarot, and enjoying myself. I hope to master it eventually. ;)

You know, there's not a day that goes by where I don't think of my dad. That also goes for when he was alive. I'm learning to move forward, and to laugh and smile again, but some days, my heart just aches. Some days I feel so ashamed, and some days I wish with all of my life, that I could turn back time. I miss dad, and I love him so much, it hurts. Some days I wish I could see him, and sit and have a conversation with him, and sometimes that need to speak to him is so strong. But I know I can speak to him, as he hears me. And I do talk to him often, and I know I'll be back in the same scenario with my father in another life, until we get it right. He was never a bad man, he was a good man, he just had issues himself. We both did.

Why am I saying all this on here? Because life is too short, and if you have someone you have in your life who you love, and who you have fallen out with, make up and do it 'now'.

Tarot.

This year I was told is a number 9 year, which means it's a year for tying all the loose ends up. I've had my tarot deck for about 5 years now, as hubby bought them for me after I told him I wanted a certain deck. He hunted it down, and got me it. So this deck is very special to me. It's the Thoth deck. I have tried time and time again to work with these cards, and I have had some success, but I feel I am restricted because I don't have full knowledge of the symbols on the cards etc... So, hubby has for my birthday, ordered me a book The Thoth Companion by Michael Osiris Snuffin
I can't wait to get it, and hopefully with the help of this book, I will understand much more about this deck.

I've also joined a tarot forum, it's one I found years ago, and finally joined up in 2006, but have only just started to post on there. I guess I wasn't drawn to the tarot as much as I am now. The forum is Aeclectic Tarot So far it seems really welcoming and I think I'm going to like it there. I've been able to read oracle cards with no problem since 2003, and although I love reading them, it's time to move onto a more serious sort of divination which is the tarot. I am hoping to eventually do readings professionally.

I love this pic.

I love this pic, it's one I had forgotten had been taken. It was taken about 1991 (I think)
Here I am hugging my dad with my youngest sister Vanessa next to me. Hugging my dad was a rare thing that we did, after he had met my step mum. During this pic, we were having troubles with our dad, but we were trying (as we did so many times) to work them out. When we were having the pics taken I just grabbed him, and hugged him, and I am so glad I did. This is one of my most favourite pic's of me and my dad.